Afternoons

Afternoon, pano na?

one of the biggest realizations i've had since i've been away here in iloilo is that "why" is not
the hardest question to answer but "how," because it will require action.

so, what to do? what to do? what to do while waiting for my life to start in august? in the first place,
bakit pala yan ang tanong ko? after all, I AM living right now, di ba? and I KNOW what i'm living for.

pero ok lang ba that i'm just biding my time (i.e. wake up at 9am, have breakfast, drink medicine, watch tv, have lunch, get out of the house asap, go to rob or sm city, smoke & drink tea, surf the net, eat some more, go home in time for dinner, wash dishes before 8pm, watch tv until i get to sleep)? o do i have to do something...what thing?

one night i found myself crying hard because all of a sudden the question of "what do i do with my life"
hit me like a bullet...pero nagpakaatatag ako. ok lang yan! kaya ko yan! when that time comes, I WILL KNOW what to do. and i also know, that it's ok to cry sometimes, it's ok to hurt sometimes, it's ok to be afraid sometimes. basta hindi na ko matitinag pa.

when it rains, it pours.
bring it on.